piece of homemade rhyming slang you have heard?

In a time when this has nothing to do with cockneys anymore, people just make up their own stuff....and some of the stuff i have heard has been hilarious!!

I was in my local last week and some bloke came in who plays in the pool team there.....he hobbled up to the bar very slowly and ordered a drink...with a grimace on his face. The manager asked him why he was walking funny and he said 'my ceramics are killing me'....the manager just nodded and said 'oooh there murder them, i had them last year'

when asked what ceramics were i got told....'ceramic tiles - piles'