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having a depressed family member who doesn't help themself

legz_akimbo [Edit] [Delete] 11:47, 15 September '12

so my dad died earlier this year and understandably my mum was / is pretty upset. It was a pretty nasty affair, a long illness that put him in a wheelchair and eventually bed-ridden with a nappy. This along with the fact he went completely psycho for a bit and nearly squandered every penny they had etc etc.
anyway. because the whole experience was a fucking nightmare i decided to get counselling afterwards (just 8 sessions on NHS like) but i feel now like they did me a lot of good.
My mum tried it once, but didn't like it because she got upset, which as far as i'm concerned is a good, natural and healthy part of getting over it.

Anyway the long shot is she's absolutely miserable, rings me up and cries and says things like 'why did it have to happen?' and that she wishes she was dead, and then texts me to say sorry and that she shouldn't be ringing me up and putting all this on me and without wanting to sound like a callous cunt, i kind of agree. I just wish she'd do something to help herself (i.e. give counselling another go) because i really don't think i can deal with someone who is that miserable but does nothing to remedy the situation.

anyone got any experience of this? any ideas on what i can do or should i just be a better son and console her?


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