I don’t get the disconnect – loutish obnoxious behaviour, fans that have to be separated at venues and pubs lest they spill over into violence, actual violence outside these places, general mob mentality, and all over a non-contact sport whose prime exponents are all basically glamour models who’d rather not mess up their hair or their shiny tanned heads. Do these people not feel silly? They may as well support respective tribes of rhythmic gymnasts. I have no issue with football as a game – it’s as good as any other arbitrary competition to knock a ball around; it’s more the strange role that it plays in society.

What am I missing here?