It's always been a company favourite - pick someone important at an industry gathering and figure out a way of calling them a cunt without getting in a lot of trouble. Repeat for the next competitor, with someone more important.

But how would you go about?

The only line that ever worked consistently for me was "which one of you cunts am I buying a hideously strong cocktail then?"

My friend, drunk and confused, once opened with "have you got a cigarette, you cunt?"

His one went down less well :-(