I play 5-a-side every Tuesday and last night we played a proper bunch of chavs who just want to fight instead of playing the 'beautiful game'. My team ended up losing 6-4, but with that the score with 5 minutes to go, they started timewasting.

One of their players took the ball into the corner and held it in the apex of the walls under his foot, which is clear obstruction. The ref (who resembled Professor Wheetos) didn't give anything and my team-mate was jockeying him, trying to get it out.

Now, I'm not a violent guy at all, but I just snapped and ran over and went to kick the ball just as he moved it slightly and I ended up kicking him. He promptly got up and yelled "Kick me again, go on, i'll stab you up bruv!" I just looked at him and said "I only got your foot, going for the ball" and eyeballed him until he backed away. Morale boosting victory!

To make it even funnier, at the end of the game, one of their 15 yr old, hooped earring wearing girlfriends remarked "Thats twice I've come to see you lot play and you've lost both times"....Erm no love, they didn't...