why do some people (generally men) get so obsessed about cars? i really don't understand it. my friend's just bought an expensive new car and he's all chuffed-to-bits with it, i'm just left scratching my head. a car is basically a tool, admittedly complicated, but a tool nonetheless. when i had a car i felt about as much affection for it as i did for the wrench i kept in it's boot.

The car my friend's got is some swanky coupe thing with 2 tiny seats in the back and a boot smaller than my skinny arse. How's he meant to transport a coffee table in that?

On the plus side, it can go much faster than the speed limit, and our congested streets, allow.

So...cars. What's that all about then?