If you’ve heard of Godhead already, and not many people in the UK have, then you’re one step ahead of most people. Apart from Marilyn Manson, because he likes ’em. And by the way, you can put down the soundtrack to Blair Witch 2 down now, because that’s were you heard them and you’re blagging it, just like a million other bands in the entire of the American nu-metal scene.

Now, as for Marilyn Manson, He musta been picking up tips when listening to them, but why choose this lot when you can rip off Skinny Puppy? Because someone’s obviously been listening to his records a lot, and now he’s ripping off the people who he inspired. It’s always sad when innovators (stand up Gary Numan, Pop Will Eat Itself), rip off the bands they influenced. And talking of people who’ve been listening to Marilyn Manson records, like the entire of Godhead, here they are. Nowadays the nu-metal template formula (thanks to Slipknot) is quite simply: big chorus with crunchy guitars + samplers. Hundreds of American bands have been following this tedious template, and yet, the US nu-metal formula is in no way different to that of the industrial scene, only it just has a different name now. Bizarre. And yet, it sells millions. Hmm go figure.

The formula here is complete: Angsty lyrics…(“Im so tired of living here”)(CHECK), Swathes of spooky keyboards nicked of old Sisters of Mercy records (CHECK, and after all nobody listens to the Sisters anymore, they only listen to Marilyn Manson OK? so no one will notice anyway). And If that’s not enough, then there’s clunky basslines (CHECK), distorted vocals (CHECK), heavy guitars (CHECK), …and the obligatory “ironic” cover of an old classic. It’s a Beatles songs , “Eleanor Rigby”. Oh how ironic, how cutting edge. How spectacularly unoriginal and predictable too.

Of course, the kids’ll love ‘em, they’ll be in the pages of Metal hammer for months to come…enjoy it while it lasts. By the time you record the second album, your audience will be demanding a little more. Like originality. That could prove more difficult, Im afraid, than simply reading the instruction manual for the Akai sampler daddy bought for your birthday.

Nu-metal by Numbers. And like, Spinal tap, the numbers here go up to 11. And the eleventh song is called “I Hate Today”. Now didn’t Minor Threat or Black Flag do that? How original. Go throw your toys out of the pram like any other nu-metal band. Complain about how shit it is now you’ve sold x-million albums and are shagging porn stars. Me? I’m gonna listen to music, rather than a generic bland faceless form of packaged rebellion. And ironically, track seven (“Penetrate” – ooh how racy) ends with the lyrics “I’m not going to imitate”. Sorry boys, its too late for that.